It was, perhaps, inevitable that there would one day be a big-screen adaptation of the wildly popular computer game, Minecraft. That being the case, we could have done far worse than A MINECRAFT MOVIE, a live-action extravaganza that will thrill the fans (and the kiddies) but leave the rest of us longing for more Jennifer Coolidge. Lots more Jennfer Coolidge. As it is, we have a lightly ironic adventure with one or two genuine laughs, some outstanding supporting players, and the indelible memory of Jack Black telling Jason Momoa to just be guided by his (Black’s) hips.
If you’ve never played Minecraft, fear not. There is a great deal of exposition to get you through the basics of the game, including the one thing not to do to Iron Golems and why breeding Creepers is a good idea. Occasionally, a diagram is thrown in, to assist in visualization. It is an enormously helpful gloss on the fanciful world divided into the Over World, and the Nether, where everything is cubic, and chickens are made no guarantees of a happy ending.
It is to this realm that the perpetually turquoise-clad Steve (Black) retreated many years ago, to judge by the grayness of his beard in the present. The real world took his (metaphorical) soul, and in the Over World, he found infinite outlets for his creativity, and a pal in Dennis the cubic wolf. Placid it is not, with darkness arriving every 20 minutes or so bringing attendant monsters, and Malgosha (Rachel House), the porcine ruler of the Nether, who longs for the magic Orb of Dominance that brought Steve to the Over World, and that she longs to use to turn it into an annex of the Nether.
Meanwhile in the real world, brother and sister and Henry and Natalie (Sebastian Hansen and Emma Myers) have just arrived in Steve’s hometown of Chuglass, Idaho after the death of their mother. The rent is cheap for the home that bedazzled Dawn (Danielle Brooks) has found them, and Natalie has just landed a job as the social media director of the local potato chip factory with the goal of growing its current 75 followers. As for Henry, he’s going to attend the local high school wearing the emphatic nametag forced on him by vice-principal Marlene (Coolidge), recently divorced but, ahem chipper about it. Henry’s first day includes becoming a pariah at school and making friends (via a tater tot pizza) with the town’s befringed celebrity, Garret aka” Garbage Man” (Jason Momoa), a washed-up champion gamer from the 80s who has retained the cocky persona and sartorial influences of his glory days.
In short order, and the usual sequence of random events, the siblings, Donna, and Garrett find themselves in the Over World, where life will suddenly get much more interesting for them, and altogether more dangerous. Even when they finally meet up with Steve for some necessary expert guidance and the exposition needed for us to follow what ensues.
This is a boisterous effects extravaganza that makes for a visually enticing experience even as the writing (a team effort) reduces the humor to its lowest age-related common–denominator. Sure there are a few quips in the real world such as troglodytes gleefully proclaiming that math has been debunked, and the intriguing choice to make Black the action hero and Momoa the bumbling doofus, but the comedy rarely rises above the level of Black and/or Momoa’s full-throated, wide-mouthed screams that go on so long there is time to name each and every one of their pearly whites. And, of course, there is much to scream about as pigs from (literally) hell pursue them with murderous intent, and the path back to the real world is populated by magical creatures, most of them fulminating with distaste for the “roundlings”.
Which brings me to Ms. Coolidge. There are snippets of her adventures with a stray Over World Villager who has wandered his sharp-edged, big-headed self through the portal separating the dimensions and right into Marlene’s oncoming vehicle. It turns into a dinner date rather than an arrest, and if the entire film had concentrated on Ms. Coolidge’s vibrantly eccentric monologue to the silent Villager, it would have rivaled the experience of MY DINNER WITH ANDRE if Wes Anderson were helming the remake.
Sigh.
Meanwhile, and for most of the film, we travel from one action sequence to another as we learn that creativity, though it might get you bullied in the real world, is a state of bliss devoutly to be wished in Minecraft, and that friendship is the real treasure. No surprises here, but thanks to tapping into an unexpected element of melancholy, Hansen’s ability to give Henry a squeak of excitement at eureka moments, and Myers’ endearingly anxious determination about growing up too fast as her brother’s legal guardian, there is a heart to the proceedings that elevates the material. And kudos to Brooks as she takes a part that is essentially one-joke and infuses it with deadly sass that makes one wonder if she is the smartest person on screen. And if there could be a spin-off with Dawn and Marlene.
A MINECRAFT MOVIE is a safe space for its younger audience even as it leaves the grown-up, non-Minecraft audience less than fully engaged, even when Black breaks into his “Lava Chicken” song.
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